I am thinking about breaking up with Nano. He's just too controlling. It's only week three in our relationship and he's already demanding that I spend all of my spare time with him. I'm working my fingers to the bone to make him happy, but it's never enough. I want time to make art and watch Supernatural while simultaneously texting my friend Brian to debate "Good Vs. Evil Sam" and put my new desk together and finish my house. But I can't because Nano's needs come first.
And what is he doing for me in return? Nothing, unless you count stressing me out. It may be best if I write him 1,667 word "Dear John" letter explaining why I'm leaving.
I'm fairly certain his sneering reaction will be to wave the letter under my nose and say, "Seriously? Why did you waste your time writing this garbage? You can't break up with me! I won't leave until you have 50,000 words! Did you post your word count today?"
In my head, Nano looks very much like Chris Baty's evil twin. (You would never be able to tell them apart except for some reason Nano has a pencil thin mustache which he drew on with a Sharpie. Hey, this scenario is in my head, I can do what I want.) In the beginning, I had such a nerdy crush on him, but I'm afraid that the honeymoon is officially over.
Sweet baby Jesus in a ninja suit, how I hate week three of National Novel Writing Month (Nano for short). The goal is to have 50,000 words by the end of November. At last count, I am approximately 16,000 words behind.
It doesn't help that I'm a "pantser" this year - as in "flying by the seat of". I didn't plan. I didn't plot. I didn't have names for my characters. I didn't think about anything past the first scene, which is, if I may say so, fabulous, though there has been an alarming decline in quality since then.
Ooo. I'm going to name my antagonist Nano Whymo.